How mindfulness introduced Mr. Dreams and Ms. Reality together

There's nothing wrong with a little reality check when you've been dreaming up a storm trying to make things happen. Although it can feel like a sting from hell and a bitch slap in the face, it's more than okay to be in that state! In fact I would be questioning you if you say you never had a moment like that!

The golden nugget we all are reaching for can either blind us to our obstacles or make us extremely aware, so much that we carry them in our backs as we continue walking towards the end result. If you're someone who picks that shit up along the way, don't sweat it, you my friend just need a little mindset switch.

Here's the thing, the feelings you have about your reality has nothing to do with me or Jane doe down the street. Whatever is going on outside of you, can only be interpreted by you within you! Get that? In a nutshell it isn't  your reality, but your perception of reality. Should I re-write that again?

We all walk around in this multidimensional layer of perception and reality everyday. Unless we utilize the power of language in our environment and mastering our mind, we can never really assume much, other than how much of an ASS we're acting. :-) 

For example, I had a goal set to achieve pertaining to my business. As I'm taking actions, I start to see questionable events that made me 2nd guess myself. As I felt the stinging and confusion, I had to learn how to "still" my brain to see what my next action should be. I meditated, I sat quietly, I didn't really allow myself to become distracted. I wanted to get to bottom rather than wasting time trying to bury any feelings of unease. I wanted to get rid of it. So there I sat! Eventually I was being tugged by my 2 year old to go and play cars! So I did, I was present for my son despite, my unease.

You cannot control what is around you, but you can surely be master of your own mind and change direction.

The thing is, If I didn't possible misjudgment could have made me quit or take on negative thoughts to what I was doing. I didn't want that. A couple of hours later I realized everything was going to be okay no matter what the results.  I love the saying that Wayne Dyer mentions in his talks about "Having a mind that is open to everything and attached to nothing", it's so very useful. You cannot control what is around you, but you can surely be master of your own mind and change direction. In my situation, I was worrying for no reason because later that day my goal was finally achieved. I just misinterpreted what the hell was going on! The funny thing is, remember when I just sat and processed? Well I had already felt peace with what I thought might be happening, so I entertained another wonderful possible direction that I was equally excited about. Talk about living in abundance! I had something great going on in one hand, with another great idea sitting there on the other hand just patiently waiting for me when I needed it! THIS IS MINDFULNESS MY FRIENDS.  

My dear, don't let limiting thoughts get in the way of your true potential! Dream big and know your priorities. Having that moment everyday to staying mindful and quiet is a practice that can take you further than you thought. It will take you to peace when your trying to cope with the "shit" that happens along the way. These struggles are nothing but a way of understanding your true nature. Don't be afraid of it. Be kind to yourself, seek support when you can, but most importantly believe and trust in your inner heart to get through it. It's possible to close the gap between your dreams and reality.

It has always been in you

Although there are things in life we cannot explain, we can rest assured that the answer will come to us when we are silent. I don't know why my best friend and love had to pass away or why he had to have cancer, but what I do know is that before him I thought I was going to die alone and unhappy. I thought nobody would ever love me. I thought that all the shame and guilt I held onto was going to be who I was going to be. I thought I was fat, ugly, sluty, and a has been.

This was my reality at the time. I had a wonderful way of keeping this away from the outside world. I walked through life with a smile that any believed I was strong and courageous. Although I would only tell part of the truth of went on, in everyone's eyes I was a female veteran who went through hell and came out standing.

But was I brave? I didn't feel like it. With all the thoughts I had about myself inside, I felt as if I was a fraud. I couldn't agree with anyone else about what they saw in me. Bravery? Heh whatever. I held on so tight to what guys would say about me when I was in the military. Like a desperate child who just wanted to belong and be loved, I grasped tightly to what was shown to me as a female soldier. I wish I understood that all the chatter in my head really wasn't mine and that it came from other's wishes not to be in pain anymore. My surroundings at Ft. Riley were nothing but a bunch of lost souls who couldn't even bare to look at themselves in the mirror. Everyone had every excuse to be shitbags on a daily basis. COMING FROM THIS PLACE MADE ME FEEL HOMELESS, DIRTY, AND AFRAID. I felt like a throw away junkie or something.

Not my Scotty! He was completely different. He was a man who stood in his own light despite what others thought. Sure he was human, he has doubts, negative thoughts, and challenges. There were parts of him that wanted to be unraveled and gawked at! He had the kindest heart, but he also had an assertive and aggressive nature to himself. He didn't like to see unjust things happen around him. Go figure he was a libra! LOL But together we walked through life moving forward as I dragged that pass with us as he dragged his own.

He was such a beautiful man, helped to me to see my potential, but for me that's all that it was. Just potential. I was still reluctant to see what he saw in me. I was only able to catch glimpses of it now and then. I had always felt my void for sure. How can someone who thought so poorly of herself stand boldly now with fervor when her "hero" left her "alone" with 2 kids?

She can because she always had it in herself. Sometimes we are pushed to wake up. This is my reality. I continue asking questions, and I continue playing my life out on this earth. But this time I can see a little bit more clearly now. So when you stand in your convictions of all the "I CAN'Ts" in your life, I asked that you look deeper and trust yourself to know who you are and what you want out of life. Just as Marie Forleo says, "Everything is figuureoutable".

Message from within

As I woke up this morning, I realized how lucky I am to be right where I am! The whole process of losing Scott to cancer and learning everything about myself the past year has been super eye opening and chaotic! Although I lost such a huge part of my life, I've gained so much in love, knowledge, self acceptance. I'm strong today not just because of Scott's love for me, but because I chose to keep going forward no matter how hard it got. I accepted all the highs and lows. Dancing with life is a lot easier than fighting with it.

I had a really awesome dream last night that I was casually hanging out with Eckhart Tolle. In my dream there were  maybe about 6 other people just having fun, talking, vibing great energy between all of us. Then he had turned to me and said something super comical. In my eyes I don't see Mr. Tolle that way. Every time I think of him, the words that come to mind are, WISE, CALM, EXPERIENCED, and QUIET. So as you can imagine, in my dream I was really pleasantly surprised he was interacting with me in that way. LOL 

Of course this led me to really decipher what the hell that dream was about because it was profound for me. What I eventually came to realize today, as I keep going through this dream in my mind, was that I needed to relax and let all the seeds I planted just grow and flourish. My dream was reminding me to not forget about the power of living in the moment. So I did that today and of course experienced much joy! This joy that comes into my life is like gold that flows in keeping my reserves rich and thriving! This is the abundance that I've always wanted. 

My new journey as an integrative nutrition health coach brings me so much motivation to serve. I have achieved exactly what I have wanted for many years, minus my beautiful friend/husband. But I have to say I believe in an afterlife in terms of energy and I also believe he has given me many gifts! 

So my message today is about self awareness in terms of where you are and where you want to go. We are just a speck in this universe, next time you're feeling suffering, know that you are not your thoughts and feelings. You are just a human being experiencing something that has a message behind everything that is happening. 

 

Minding your gut feelings

How many of us have regretted not going with our "gut feelings"?  Call it intuition, universe, or God, but in between the spiritual aspects of our lives and our physical world, we also have to deal with everything in between. As a practitioner of mind body wellness, I'm a firm believer that our gut feelings can tell us a lot about not only what's going on in the physical body, but also our mental well being. When we feel bloated constantly we don't realize how much it can affect our thoughts and actions during the day. Not to mention there's so many of us who think having BMs every 4 days is normal. Then we start realizing our mid section keeps growing, we're sluggish, and we're foggy thinkers! Not to mentions our thoughts of self worth start kicking in.....it's the vicious cycle of a condition that so many of us have!  It's really time to mind our gut feelings figuratively and literally speaking.

You can tell a lot about what's going on with someone when we start to look deeper into the gut. It's not a surprise that we when look at just about all diseases and conditions today, the root cause nearly always leads us back to the digestive system. Today's science is now terming the gut as the "second brain". We also know that the epidemic of heart disease, diabetes, obesity, and rising autoimmune diseases are the conditions resulting from our own lifestyle choices and what we decide to eat. So it's not a mystery that when we want to achieve our most optimal health, it helps to understand how our bodies process what we eat and what we think.

We should know by now that our guts are contained with a diverse ecological community of bacteria that helps break down our food for energy. This is our microbiome or microbiota. Think of your gut as a neighborhood with both the good guys and the bad guys. When there aren't enough of the good guys, the bad bad ones take over and bam there's a riot going on in your gut. When our "neighborhood" has deficiencies, it hinders our ability to convert those nutrients into everything that we are like our skin, nails, and hair! We are literally what we eat.  It can also challenge our immune system which brings about conditions such as Fibromyalgia, IBS, and even allergies. It's this chain reaction within our bodies that may inhibit our ability to sustain a healthy weight and have the energy we strive for. 

So what do we do? Instead of dishonoring ourselves by reaching for more sugar, "food like" substances, and chemicals, we need to detoxify not only our gut, but also our minds. if you are someone who is just starting to take care of yourself and are overwhelmed with all the information out there. Here are at least 4 basic principles that will get you going in the right direction.

1. Eat clean: Cook your own food. You will know what's exactly in it. Whole foods and ingredients you can pronounce is the most optimal nutrition your body can get. If what you are eating has a shelf life longer than you, you might want to think twice about it. Also CUT the sugar. You hear it time and time again, it's not great for you! Hello inflammation!

2. Add probiotics: You can't hurt yourself by eating activia or a good quality yogurt with all those wonderful good guys of probiotics in your gut! Keep your gut strong, clean and healthy with a daily quality probiotic supplement or foods such as sauerkraut, pickles, kefir, and yogurt! Personally I do both :-)

3. Hydrate: Our bodies function best when we are well lubricated and hydrated. We are made up of liquidity gushy stuff that requires A LOT of water! LOL Keep the gears and wheel well hydrated and help flush out toxins by drinking enough water! At LEAST 8 glasses a day :-) Sometimes it's the simplest things we tend to forget!

4. Ground yourself: Because we are always busy and out of focus with our priorities, grounding exercises can help us to slow down and focus on what's important. Grounding exercises can be anything that helps to slow your consciousness down to become clear. This can be meditation, an easy walk, yoga, relaxing hobby, or even signing to yourself! Whatever your heart desires. Study show that when you have a stress management system in place, it greatly affects our parasympathetic nervous system to respond in ways that positively helps us get through the hard times most efficiently. Stress in all ways is our #1 cause of disease.

Life can be simple, we just make it confusing and difficult! If you don't know where to start these 4 concepts will get you going. It isn't rocket science, its going back to our roots. It's about taking our ancient wisdom and combining it with the modern medicine that has indeed played a huge part in keeping all alive. So take action, detoxify your life just one step or one plate at a time! Go easy on yourself it's a practice. Get support and find that time to slow down and not only educate yourself, but REMEMBER what it is you already know and tap into what is needed for you to feel whole and vitality again! Happy searching!

If you're looking for more support and have questions, feel free to contact me and get a 1 hour discovery health session for free! As a health coach located in Santa Clarita CA. I help to detoxify the mind and body to help folks get back their energy, vitality, and sexy!!! 

Next Phase

Long time no write! It feels like forever. Last I was on a journey to make change and stand in my convictions. I was on this raging quest to have a voice and be creative. I would sometimes hold back thoughts and think to myself, "Shit I can't write that, people may think I'm really nuts". Then it would lead me to think, "Well then, what do I write?" So Here I am more than a year later with a lot to say. Never knew what I had coming to me back then.

How in the heck do I start? Well I lost my husband over a year ago to cancer. I gave birth several months before that, and now I'm well  on my journey of starting my own holistic health coaching practice for caregivers who work with people who are significantly sick or disabled. Basically CARE FOR THE CAREGIVERS.

Life has been both brutal and kind to me in many ways. When Scott died I was forced into a place where I had to practice some radical healing. I have never been a huge practitioner of the spiritual side of me, but geez did that change dramatically. Thinking about it now I wished I had done more of it in the past. But today is a new day, and I've made the courageous choice to fulfill an entrepreneurial dream that both Scott and I had when he was still around. To run a successful business that promotes health and wellness. How can it get any better than that! It's truly a way of healing for me for sure.

I am no different than a lot of you that has had to deal with grief/loss. I go through the pain, but I also feel the exhilaration to make waves in honor of him. It definitely helps that my husband was  the fearless entrepreneur type. Between the both of us, I was the meek introvert who was perfectly happy to be in the background of it all. I've taken so much from our time together and now I'm having all these thoughts and feelings that I have never ever thought I would have in a million years.

I'm fearlessly walking the walk and digging deep inside to answer by most burning call within me. That is to reach out to others. Hear many stories. To listen and dream with others as well. See Scott and I always knew deep inside that the only thing that really mattered was leaving an impression after your gone. But what I've learned up to now was that even with all the conundrum of our lives to "make it" in this world, buy a house, have a savings account, pay the bills on time, and build your credit, all of that stuff wasn't going to be what made you smile before you say your last good bye to all the people you love here on earth.

In the end for Scott, he understood everything and became his own little quiet happy Buddha as he exited this world. I saw this first hand and learned so much from it. From the beginning of our lives together, to the end of our physical presence in that room late that night.

It's learning to forgive when your being mistreated. Having to stand up when nobody will, and being the change you wish to see in this world. It's about checking your ego and letting things be as they are, all the while you demonstrate your strength through kindness. It also learning to trust yourself and forgive yourself on this journey. See there is no time like now. Right now we can choose to see things as they are and make change. There is no time other than the one time that was given to you right here on earth right now.

For me that is building this practice to walk with others in their journey. For you? What will that be? Now is your time.

If you know someone going through tough times regarding their health both mind and body please visit my website for more information and to get the conversation started. Peace and Love!

www.mindfullshift.com
To connect on my Facebook group click here  

Leveraging your convictions

There is something very powerful about acknowledging not only your strengths but also the areas you need help in. When you cope up to your true abilities, you are taking one step closer to holistic success, and who doesn't want that. Keep in mind when I say holistic success, it doesn't mean you must be perfect, because you know there's no such thing. It means being honest and open to new possibilities. Owning everything about who you are the good and the bad. Could your world be a better place if you knew you couldn't fail? Could your loved ones live a different life, if you knew you could indeed help them?

So how could you turn your dreams into reality? That question is only answered by you and you alone. Your conviction is the only thing that will get you there. You've got be comfortable feeling a little bit uneasy and a perceived a little nuts, because it's your conviction and commitment that is going to get you one step closer to a clearer picture of your dreams. I don't believe in pessimism, I don't believe in shutting down possibilities. Because of this, I am still alive, became healthy loosing 31 lbs,  I have a wonderful partner in crime who loves me to death, I have a happy and healthy child with severe disabilities, and I am living a wonderful journey that is only going to get better.

I could have chose to stay down by the sexual trauma, emotional abuse, struggles as single parent with a child with severe disabilities, loosing family members, and being subject to many other forms of abuse and crimes. I could go on and on but my point is, I live my life and I choose to live a fulfilling one despite the pain I feel from time to time. Let's face it we feel vulnerable at times because we are human, we just don't necessarily process it the best way we can.

What if I told you that you can accomplish awesome and beautiful things and make your dreams a reality in your life without loosing who you are and what you love, would you honestly pass that opportunity up? Many become stuck right there because we fear the "hows" and the unknowns of what it takes to get there. This is the time where LEVERAGING YOUR CONVICTIONS come into play!

If you have passion and conviction. I mean true undeniable passion, you will stop at nothing until you have addressed what it was that is lurking in you. It's that conviction and strong passion that will hold you up, cuddle you and keep you warm in times of self doubt and fear. Your conviction, your "why" is your reason, your motive, your cause, and your drive that floats you right up to that next step.

Cigarette smokers: You know when you have that hankering for another puff?
Chocolate addicts: You know when you just HAVE to have that truffle and drive to the store just to get it?
Runners: You know when you just worked out or ran, you are so thirsty you just drank nearly half a gallon of water?

People where is your hankering, craving, or thirst for true fulfilling life? If it's a business you want running, or if it's a relationship you want to have, or wanting to start an organization, what ever it is.................why aren't you looking into it? Why aren't you taking steps? Just take the small steps if you have to, its also about the journey. You character must be built in order for you to be fulfilled. How satisfied would you feel if you were given everything you wanted. Do you know how awful and unfulfilled you would be?  Personally I like to walk the talk. My name is attached to this may I remind you :-)

Leveraging you convictions is a very powerful. Weather its for your personal life, financial, or business, it gives you a way and a map toward the goal.

   

Green Day - Nuclear Family - [Animated Music Video] Contest Winner

Of course I have to post something from my most favorite band in the world Green Day!